


Killjoy Life

by CrownKiller



Series: Killjoy Life [1]
Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Aliens, Also it has narrators, Also no cursing, Alternate Universes, Fabulous Killjoys come later, I don't, It's Implied Though, Many O.C, Multi, Nazi Zombie Penguins, No Sex, Other Evil Corporations, Sinister Political Operations, Time Travel, Torture, at the end, danger days, does anyone even read these?, eggplants, just kidding, like a tv show, no eggplants for now
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-27
Updated: 2019-02-06
Packaged: 2019-05-29 12:36:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15073295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrownKiller/pseuds/CrownKiller
Summary: Adrenaline Angel finds her steampunk time-traveling friend while running from Zombie Nazi Penguins. Together, they must defeat BLI, and SPO (Sinister Political Operations). However, when Angel is tossed in an alternate universe, and comes back, 20 years have passed and everything is turned upside down now. Will she be able to save everyone she loves with the help of the fabulous four?





	1. Nazi Penquin Zombies

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! My friend and I co-wrote this. Please tell me if you find any mistakes. It is confusing, a little. It's set up as a t.v. show, so at the end, there are narrators.

*Angel had left a note on the counter for her friends saying that she'd be back in a few days. She had to take care of some stuff at her hideout. She had been all set to leave and come home when her computer dinged. She had scavenged parts to build an one, seeing as after the Helium War, all technology was in Battery City, except a few radios people had cobbled together. Leaning over the desk, she opened the email. It was from her friend, Micheil. She frowned. She'd assumed he'd died. One day, right before the war started, he was at her door, spouting gibberish and wearing a top hat and the next day, his house destroyed. This was curious. But, she supposed she did have to answer it.

She began to read:

'Dearest Camille,' it began. She shuddered. Why was he using her real name?! That was dangerous. She shook herself and continued reading. 

'I'm deeply sorry for falling out of touch with you, but I had more pressing concerns to attend to. Rest assured that I am well and we shall soon meet again. When I came back to Earth, I was astonished to discover that it was under the control of a horrible company! I wish to destroy this company and I shall need your help. Unfortunately, as I've been gone for quite some time, I don't know if you still have what it takes, so I prepared a test for you. I do hope you come out of it alive!

Sincerely,  
Sir Percival'

What was this?! Angel shook her head. There was no way this was real. Someone must have been pretending to be him. She turned and grabbed her backpack. Time to go. She turned around and promptly fell over something. Sitting up, she looked behind her. It was a penguin! What the heck? All the penguins were dead. She studied it closer as it turned to face her. It had a Nazi costume on. This was ridiculous! She had to be hallucinating and she was sure of it now, as the penguin moaned "Brainsss...". Looking closer, she could see that the penguin was dead. However, it seemed like the little animal hadn't got the memo, so she'd have to help it. Whipping her ray gun out, she blasted it. The penguin collapsed and Angel heaved a sigh of relief.

Hauling herself up, she opened the door. Staring at her were at least a thousand more Nazi Penguin Zombies. She slammed the door shut and they began to pound against it. How was she going to escape this?*

 

Whoa! That was a cliffhanger. Anyway, I'm the narrator! Only I kinda just read the story and add my two cents at the end of each chapter. Whatever. Moving on... Next time, on Killjoy Life... will Angel be turned into a zombie? Is this the end of life as we know it? Will I get a Nazi Zombie Penguin to keep as a pet? I hope so!


	2. Genetically Modified Piranhas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another one! Possibly more insane than the last.

* Angel darted around in desperation. The zombie Nazi penguins had compromised her base and she could never return. She'd have to take some more stuff then she thought with her. She whirled around the room, grabbing spare guns and masks. After hesitation, she grabbed a frayed necklace made of string. Stuffing it all in her backpack, she rounded and grabbed a book off her bookshelf. 

Her bookshelf swang forward, revealing a secret passage... just as the door broke and thousands of Zombie Nazi penguins swarmed in. Yelping, she ran down the passage and vaulted over a pit full of piranhas, mutated from the radiation. Turning around, she saw all the penguins falling into the pit and being quickly devoured by the piranhas, which come to think of it, she'd never really fed. Oops. The churning water quickly turned red with blood and Angel felt quite sick. It was one thing to ghost dracs, but all that blood? Disgusting. She fled down the passage, as far away from the gruesome scene as fast as she could.

After slipping out the front door and making sure there were no more threats in the general vicinity, she strolled confidently to her car. It was a Trans-Am that she'd liberated from BLI. Sliding behind the wheel, she flipped the backpack into the backseat and drove away in a cloud of exhaust. It was only when she was far away from her place that she began breathing again. Then the tire blew out. She sighed. It was apparently too soon to celebrate. Skidding into the shoulder, she glanced in the review mirror. There was a convoy of dracs heading her way. They must have shot out her tire. Cursing, she twisted around to grab her gun out of her pack. As she was about to head out, she realized she didn't have her mask on. Where was her mask? WHERE WAS IT? The dracs were getting closer and she couldn't go against them without her mask.

Then she spotted it. It had been under her seat. Scowling, she slid it on and jumped out of the car, ready to fight. The convoy stopped and eight... no twelve... fifteen dracs came spilling out of the two cars! What the the heck? Were they all clowns? There was no way that was possible. This was the worst day ever. There was no way one killjoy could go against fifteen dracs.*

 

Hi! Narrator here. That sounds really bad. To be honest, I kinda don't know how she's gonna get out of this one. Also, I didn't get a penguin OR a piranha as a pet. This is horrible. I'm pretty sure that's cruelty to narrators. Is that even a legit movement? No? Well it should be. Anyway, next time on Killjoy Life... How will Angel survive? Does she even survive? I'm placing 10 carbons on the scenario that she's kidnapped and taken back to Battery City. Any takers? No? Okay. I've just been informed that I'm legally not allowed to run betting pools and that she's not being kidnapped. Well this sucks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed my craziness.


	3. Man, Who is this Rude Stranger?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone shows up and man, he is a jerk. Actually, Angel's kind of the jerk. But she's surprised and he's not clean either. They're both jerks, okay?

*The dracs began firing. Groaning, Angel ducked behind her car for coverage. Peeking over the top, she managed to ghost three. Yay. Twelve more to go. And they were getting closer. Angel was going to die… or worse, be captured and turned into one. Suddenly, the barrage of shots that had been flying over her head stopped. Risking a quick look, it seemed like all their weapons had stopped working. She might live after all. However, when she raised her gun to fire, nothing came out either. What the heck?! She’d just charged this thing. 

Looked like she’d be doing this the old fashioned way: With a knife. She grabbed it out of the waistband of her pants and steeled herself. Peeking over the top of the car, she saw that they’d began approaching her, pulling their spare weapons out. One made a pass, but she dodged and managed to jam her weapon under his rib-cage. Blood instantly gushed out, turning the pristine white uniform red. Grabbing her knife, she ran further away. She darted behind a cactus only to find one waiting for her. So she punched it. 

The drac collapsed to the sand and Angel turned to flee, only to run straight into one… like literally run into one. She attempted to get away, but he’d grabbed her, and soon the other dracs had caught up. They began dragging her to their car, trying to get her back to the city. Angel struggled, even though she knew that escape was impossible. There were still ten dracs left. Tears pricked her eyes, turning the world a mess of blurry smudges.

Suddenly all the dracs convulsed. One by one, they dropped to the desert floor, letting Angel go. Angel stared at them in confusion. What was going on? Cautiously approaching one, she took it’s pulse. It was dead. All of them were dead. But what had killed them?

“Hello Camille,” someone spoke behind her. Whipping around, Angel took in the strangest sight she’d ever seen. The guy that had spoken had a dark blue trench coat on and a top hat with goggles. There was a satchel hanging by his side and he was holding a device in his hands. She didn’t like the looks of that. He was also a good 8 inches taller than her.

“Calm down. I’m not going to hurt you,” he said soothingly. “You need to come with me” he said confidently. That was a mistake. You couldn’t trust people nowadays, and going around saying stuff like that was a good way to get yourself ghosted. Angel slowly slid her knife out. “I’m not going anywhere with anyone,” she called out. His eyes narrowed at her. “You don’t understand. The fate of your world depends on it,” He snapped. Angel raised her eyebrow at that. “My world? Last I checked, this world is yours too.”

He stammered a bit.“Th-That’s not the point! Didn’t you get my email? It’s me, Michael.” 

Angel squinted and looked at him. He did bear a resemblance. Could it… ? No, BLI had rounded everyone up at the beginning. No way it was him. “He’s dead. Died at the beginning of the war. You’re one sick freak for impersonating him. So what’s gonna happen is I walk away and you leave me alone forever,” she said harshly.

He shifted a little. He looked at her and his eyes widened. Looking closely, Angel saw a few beads of sweat on his forehead and the way his hands trembled slightly and gripped his satchel. She hid a small smirk. He was scared. Then she looked closer. He was looking at something behind her. Whipping her head around, she saw a small dust plume. Someone was coming, and they’d be there in less than 20 minutes. 

She turned back and smirked. “Looks like you’re in trouble.”

“Please. You have to come with me,”

“Sorry. I work alone,” Angel smiled and moved to her car.

In the blink of an eye, he’d moved in front of her and had gripped her shoulders. “It wasn’t a request.” he growled as his eyes bored into her. It was then she felt it. He’d pricked her with something when he’d grabbed her. The world grew blurry and she collapsed into his arms. Angel probably would’ve cursed if she’d been able to, but all she could do was close her eyes and fall into oblivion.  
…

Michael sighed and scooped Angel’s limp body up. That went well he thought as he strolled to the car. He draped her body in the passenger seat and carefully buckled her in. He rummaged in his satchel and pulled out another device. After pointing it at the busted tire and pressing a few buttons, the tire repaired itself. Michael slipped into the driver's seat and turned it on. He was about to drive off when a thought struck him. Turning to Angel, he stripped her of her weapons. It’s not that he couldn’t take her, but he didn’t want a scared trigger-happy killjoy with anything dangerous when she woke up. He pulled out of the sand with a screech and was long gone before the mysterious people on the horizon got there.*

Whoa. That was EPIC! Am I allowed to say that, or do I have to remain impartial? Whatever. Is that really Michail? If so, where has he been all these years and what are those strange devices? Who were the people he’s scared of? Why don’t I have any popcorn?! I feel like I should get free popcorn included in my paycheck. It’s not like I’m paid but popcorn would be nice >:(


	4. Chatting Over Cinnamon Buns Like The Grandmas We All Wish We Were

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They chat in the car with cinnamon buns. The title kind of explains it all, it's pretty self-explanatory

Angel swam out of the darkness slowly. She could vaguely hear the engine of the Trans-Am purring. Her hair was in her face. She reached up to brush it away, and that’s when she realized that her hands were handcuffed to the door. Eyes flying open and jolting upright, she remembered all that had happened. That stupid stranger! He must have trussed her up while she was unconscious. Did that mean… ? Yep. Her questions were answered when his hand landed on her shoulder and pushed her back against the seat. He was driving her car. Red hot anger pulsed through her, drowning out all sound. She took a few deep breaths and shook her head. She wasn’t going to get out of this mess by blowing stuff up. She would need reason and cunning on her side. Plus, he had probably searched her and taken her weapons while she’d slept.

“Where are you taking me?” she asked. Much to her chagrin, her voice wavered. She wasn’t scared at all (well, maybe a little). He shot a side glance at her and his eyes softened. “Just a safe place where we can talk.” He returned his gaze to the road ahead. “Why can’t we talk now?” His hands tightened on the steering wheel at her harsh question. Swerving into the shoulder, he swiftly turned the car off and turned to face her. “Are you hungry?” he asked, cocking his head and scrutinizing her. “No,” came the sullen reply, followed quickly by the growling of her stomach. He grinned at her glare. He’d won this round. “Are you sure? Cause I have cinnamon buns.” He pulled a box out of thin air and opened it. Sure enough, there were cinnamon buns inside.

Angel stared at him in amazement. “How? Cinnamon buns don’t exist anymore.” 

“I’m magic. So here's what's gonna happen. I’m gonna feed you, and you’re gonna stay quiet while I talk and explain.”

“Can you let me go?” She looked up at him, chewing her lip.

He hummed thoughtfully for a moment, leaning back against the upholstery. “No… not yet.”

“How am I going to eat? My hands are tied.” she gestured to them, then began giggling. “My hands are tied… See what I did there?” 

Michael rolled his eyes. “You haven’t changed at all.” He tore a piece off one of the buns and shoved it in her mouth. “Now shut up and let me weave my tale of woe.”

“So, you remember the day before I disappeared? I came round your house, blabbing about time-travel and what-not?”

Angel nodded and opened her mouth to speak. Michael shoved another piece in.

“I told you not to speak. Anyway, it was all true. The next day, I’d been taken to the galaxy far away, which sounds cliche, but it’s true. I was on planet Tardin. There I learned how to navigate the time-streams. Not to brag but, I was pretty good at it. The people in charge were the presidents.”

He stuffed another bun in her mouth to ward off the questions. 

“Yes I know that sounds weird. I’m not sure if they just took the forms of them or if they were really them. Anyway, one day I saw the future of Tardin. A civil war had happened and and evil corporation, SPO had taken over. SPO stands for Sinister Political Operations by the way. I thought that if I rebelled, I could prevent this from happening. Instead, I’m the one that caused the fall of Tardin’s peaceful era. Now SPO is in command and after me. I’m the public enemy number 1. That’s why we had to get away from the cloud dust.

“You see now why I had to sedate you, as you were being uncooperative.” he finished.

Angel looked at him suspiciously. “Why did you come after me? I could have died while you were gone, you know.”

He cleared his throat. “Yes… well, I came back to Earth to hide out for a bit. Imagine my surprise when I discovered that your world was also under the control of an evil corporation. So, I looked around the time streams and I found that if I help you defeat BLI, then you’ll help me defeat SPO.”

“I still don’t know you’re Michael, by the way.”

“Then test me. Ask me anything about us.”

Angel narrowed her eyes and thought for a second. Finally she smiled triumphantly, having thought of a question. “What’s my first name?” Back before the Helium wars, she’d gone by her middle name and no one, save for her family and Michael, knew her first name. 

“Anna. You hate it when someone calls you that.” 

“Fine,” she conceded, “I guess you are Michael.”

“Cool. So, what do ya say. Wanna help me save the world?” 

Angel stared out the window. Ten minutes ago she’d been ready to blow this guy’s brains out but now? She didn't know. Everything did technically add up. I mean, even though it was crazy, the story explained how Michael had vanished, plus all of the new technology he had. And no one knew her first name now but her, since her family had died in the war. 

She turned back to Michael. “Sure. Let’s do this.” She would help him, but watch him carefully still. Any sign that he wasn’t who he said he was and she would ghost him. He grinned. “Great.” 

“Can you uncuff me now?” She rattled her hands at him.

He at least had the audacity to look ashamed as he sheepishly said “Yeah, let me give you a hand.” He waved his fingers in a complex pattern and the cuffs popped open. Angel stared at them. “Dude, that’s sick.”

“I know, right! No one else thinks it’s cool though. Whatever.” with that, Michael started the car and they sped off. *

That was not bad, for a filler I guess. Only now I’m hungry. Man this job stinks. I don’t get paid, don’t get pets and worst of all, I get no food. That’s it. I’m gonna show them that you can’t treat narrators like this. I QUIT!! *Sounds of chair being pushed back, then feet stomping out of a room before slamming of a door* *it is quiet. Crickets start chirping* *Crickets still chirping* *Door opens again and someone takes the chair again. They're muttering quietly* Can’t leave… have to find out what happens. Curse writers and their plot hooks. Anyway! How will Michael and Angel save the world? Where is Michael taking them? Find out next time on Killjoy Life!


	5. Things Get A Little 'Out Of Hand'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> eesh. Things get intense

*The car hummed along the open road for a few minutes before Angel looked at Michael in concern. 

“Do you even know where you’re going.”

Michael fixed his eyes on the road. “Of course,” he said, then swallowed thickly. 

Angel sighed, shook her head, and grabbed Michael’s shoulder.

“Pull over. I’m driving now,” the determination was clear in her voice.

“No, I can do this,” Michael weakly argued. 

“No. You obviously don’t know where to go, and the car is low on gas. Pull over.” Her voice grew steely and hard. Michael had no choice but to comply. Sliding into the shoulder in a spray of dust and sand, they made a quick switch, and were off again. 

Angel handed the car with confidence, only one hand on the wheel. The other sat stationary on the windowsill. Michael sat awkwardly in the passenger seat, stealing glances at Angel now and again. She puzzled him. Before he’d left, she’d been a shy little thing, always following the rules. Comprised of soft curves and rainbows, Angel had been almost sickeningly sweet. But now, though she still acted sweet, Michael sensed that the curves had turned into sharp edges, and the rainbows to thunderstorms. And the confidence! The old Angel never would have spoken with such conviction. Not for the first time, Michael wondered just what had happened while he’d been gone.

A burst of music snapped Michael out of his train of thought. Angel had switched on the radio ad was turning the knobs back and forth, looking for a specific frequency.

“You do know that only Battery City plays stuff right? Turn it off!” Michael snapped. Angel just smirked and kept searching. Michael was about to pull her hand off the dusty dials when a burst of static and then a clear voice filled the car. “Look alive sunshine…” Michael looked at her in disbelief. “You have your tricks, I have mine,” Angel smiled. Soon a catchy beat and screaming voices filled the car. She started screaming along to it and Michael leaned back in his seat. 

Relentless desert sun streamed through the windows, clearly illuminating specks of dust everywhere and making Angel’s hair sparkle. Michael smiled. For the first time since he started out, it felt like he might be able to succeed at his mission. 

…

They stopped outside a derefit building. “What is this place? Why are we here?” Michael asked, slightly puzzled. It was obvious that the building had been abandoned a long time ago. Angel shot him a look. “Don’t judge a book by it's cover,” She ducked around back and Michael followed, starting to get annoyed at her vague implications that he should know this place.

He dashed around the corner in time to see her disappear through a storm-cellars doors. Sighing, he followed her down into darkness. “Don’t cause any trouble, okay?” she told him quietly before opening the door at the end of the stair. It opened up to reveal a club. Michael blinked. He’d not been expecting that.

Colored smoke drifted through the dim air, lit up by strobe lights coming from an unseen source. A mass of bodies surged as one on the floor, and he had no idea what they were doing there. He grabbed the edge of Angel’s sleeve and pulled her back to face him. “Wait! What…” “Isn’t it awesome?” She cut him off with a grin. “But what are we doing here?” “I need to pick up some items… and gas. You’ll be fine, I’ll be back soon,” With that, she slipped out of his grasp and disappeared into the crowd.

Michael huffed and rocked back on his feet. He had no idea how to navigate through this kind of place. Suddenly someone spun by and bumped into him hard, making him nearly lose his grip on his satchel. “Hey!” he called out, clearly annoyed. “Watch where you’re going!” The guy paused, and it was only then that Michael noticed just how bigger than him the guy was. Slowly, he turned around and glowered at him. 

“What did you say?” his low voice was a growl and Michael unconsciously took a step back. “Uhh… nothing. I said nothing!” Michael said and then tried to flee the terrifying person. The guy simply grabbed Michael by his neck and pulled him close. Something poked against his back and Michael stiffened, knowing that it was a gun. “We’re gonna take a little trip outside. No funny business, you hear?” Michael nodded, his heart in his throat. If he could just grab one of his inventions, he could take this punk, but before he could even attempt, his arms were twisted behind his back and secured with handcuffs.

They headed up the stairwell and into the blinding afternoon light. Michael was pushed forward, even as his eyes were screwed shut. Pushed against the wall, he reflected on how he was going to die. Him! Public enemy number 1 to SPO, and he was going to be taken out by a two-bit killjoy. In an instant, Michael was on the ground, a searing pain spreading through his stomach. He’d been sucker-punched. The guy began kicking and whaling on him. Trying to minimize the area he could kick, Michael curled up into a tiny ball. That was useless, as the guy just switched tactics and shoved him into the wall. 

Finally broken, Michael slumped to the ground. A rough hand grabbed his face and he was forced to look at his tormentor. He was twirling a knife between his fingers. “This has been fun, I’ll admit. I might keep you as a pet. Would you enjoy that?” Michael groaned and tried to squirm out of his grip, but to no avail. The guy chuckled. “Yeah, I think I’ll keep you. But first, I’m gonna mark you as mine.” The cold blade pressed against his face, above his right eye. Just as he was about to lose his eye, a shot whizzed past and both of them paused.

“If you wish to live to ghost another drac, I suggest you step away from my friend, Beast.” Angel’s clear voice rang through the air. Both turned to see her silhouetted in the setting sun, gun pointed steady at Beast. He released Michael and took a step towards Angel. Slumping against the ground, Michael ignored the pain everywhere and focused on the action. There was no way Angel could take that guy, he had to help her. But his hands were still cuffed and now black dots were dancing around his vision. The intense conversation snapped him out of his train of thought.

“You know, I’ve never liked you. This finally gives me an opportunity to ghost you,” Beast smiled. “I’d like to see you try,” Angel smiled confidently. They charged at one another and that's when Michael passed out. 

…

Someone was shaking him. “Wh-what?” Michael opened his blurry eyes. The image in front of him finally condensed into Angel, with a small cut on her cheek, but looking no worse for wear. A broad smile split her face. “Thank the Phoenix Witch, I thought you were dead!” she exclaimed. Her loud voice made his head pound. He gurgled, trying to get her to stop. Her face filled with concern. “Hey, let's get you to the car, I know a guy that can fix you up,” she hoisted him up. Head swimming, he wasn’t much help at all, and Angel was practically dragging him.

They passed by something. Michael sifted to look at it. “Hey, no, don’t look at that,” Angel chided, moving them even quicker past the thing. But it was too late. He’d already seen the desecrated corpse of Beast. He swam in and out of consciousness from then on. He vaguely remembers getting in the car, and driving somewhere. But after that everything faded into a dark abyss.*

Okay. Are we just going to low key pretend that ANGEL DIDN’T JUST MURDER SOMEONE!! Like, holy cow, that girl has no chill. Actually, that was kind of awesome. But where is she taking Michael? What was she picking up? And how are they gonna get the handcuffs off of him?!


	6. Love and Blood is in the Air

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angel finds some help for Michael

*Adrenaline Angel raced down the highway, risking glances at Michel every now and then. His face was puffy and bruised, and she was sure that it was the same on his torso. She needed to get home. There, he could be checked out for broken ribs and stuff. What if his rib was broken and had punctured his lung? What if he was dying? She pressed down on the gas steadily as each new thought overtook her. She couldn’t get there fast enough.  
…  
The Fabulous Killjoys had just settled in for dinner when they heard a car pull up and its doors open violently. Instantly all went into defense mode. Jet and Kobra flanked the sides of the door, ready to take out anyone who came in, while Party and Ghoul ducked under the counter to give them coverage in the event of a gunfight.They waited breathlessly, hearing the footsteps come closer until the door to the diner slammed open. “GUYS! I NEED YOUR HELP!!” Angel burst in the house, carrying someone injured. Kobra nearly shot her. “Don’t do that.” he said, annoyed. “I nearly ghosted you. Why didn’t you radio?”

She gaped at him. “Because my friend was jumped and I didn’t have time!” Her eyes shimmered and for a moment Kobra regretted snapping at her. Then he stamped down his pity. She knew better.

“Okay guys, calm down,” Jet intervened. Party and Ghoul breathed a sigh of relief. Last thing they needed was a cat-fight, and Kobra and Angel could spar all day. “Let’s take care of this guy,” Jet tried to grab Michael. Angel refused to let go. “Angel? I need you to let go so I can treat him,” Jet spoke gently. She was gasping for breath like she’d just run a marathon. Jet caught the eyes of the others and motioned to Angel. ‘Take care of her while I sort this guy out’ his eyes said. Or something to that effect. Didn’t matter, because they got the memo. 

“Hey Angel,” Ghoul jumped over the counter and walked over to her. “Do ya wanna explain how this happened while your friend gets stitched up?” While speaking, he firmly worked her hands off of Michael until Jet was able to grab him and her hands dangled by her sides.

“There were Nazi zombie penguins,” she said, staring blankly ahead. The others paused in their activities and looked at each other. “Shock,” they chorused. “Okay, take care of her, and maybe stitch up that cut on her cheek.” Jet tilted her face up to get a better look. “Yeah, stitch it up. It’s really deep. I’m gonna go take care of this guy.” He disappeared down the hall.

The others looked at each other. “Party and I wanted some alone time,” Ghoul said. “No,” Kobra was unmoving. “C’mon. Please???” Party whined. Kobra just stared at them. Ghoul and Party looked at each other in desperation. “I’ll let you pick the music when we’re driving for a week,” Party offered.

“Two.”

“What! No way, that’s too much.”

“It’s my final offer,”

Party looked at Ghouls’ pleading eyes and caved. “Fine,” he ground out. Ghoul smiled and began dragging Party back to their bedroom. “But stitch her up well, or Jet will have a fit. And no fights!” Party yelled before the door slammed shut. Kobra sighed and started dragging Angel to the sofa.

Contrary to popular belief, they didn’t hate each other. They respected each other and their different ways of fighting. It became a game of sorts, trying to best one another in combat, whether it be mentally or physically.

Kobra was cold, striking fast and effectively. In a fist fight, you’d be on the ground before you knew what happened. In a verbal fight, he would decimate you with information that you thought was private, all without any change to his expression.

Angel was a wildcard. She was a flurry of limbs and teeth in a fight. No one could keep track of her, not to mention that she was ambidextrous so… yeah, people were screwed. Verbally, she would destroy your argument and character in two sentences, all while smiling brightly, as if she had no clue what she was saying. 

They fascinated each other. They were complete polar opposites and they reveled in it. Sometimes, if no one else was watching, they’d sit down and just discuss the pressing things in life. If they could defeat BLI, or what would happen when they died, and all kinds of stuff.

Kobra sat Angel down on the couch and rummaged through the dresser to get some medical supplies. Nothing fancy, just thread, needle and a flask of alcohol. Kobra hovered for a moment, unsure of how to proceed. Breathing deep, he worked his belt free and sat down. “Okay, let’s do this,” he muttered.

He gave Angel a quick shot of alcohol, then after showing the belt in her mouth and pulling her down on his lap, he poured some right into the cut. She screamed of course, but it was muffled. Kobra began meticulously stitching it up. Reaching up, Angel pulled the belt out. Kobra risked a glance. There were teeth marks on it. He had really liked that belt. Sighing, he went back to work.

“You wanna tell me what actually happened?” he asked softly, after a few minutes.

Angel began running her mouth, talking about zombie Nazi penguins (still) and clowns. Kobra tuned out. He wasn’t dealing with that level of crazy. He only begun paying attention when she said something about killing Beast. “Who whoa wait,” he held up a hand. “You killed Beast?!” 

She nodded.

“Why? Once his group finds out, you’re dead!”   
“He had jumped Michael! He was gonna keep him,”

Kobra shivered at that. No one liked Beast, due to his business… but in the zones you just learned to deal with it. There were more pressing matters at hand after all. Kobra leaned back into the sofa and thought about this. If Angel had really killed Beast… 

Slowly he gathered what must have really happened, since Zombie Nazi penguins don’t exist. Beast must have caught Angel and drugged her up. While drugged, she met her friend and they escaped together. They got injured along the way and Angel murdered Beast. Oh this was just perfect. 

Looking down, he noticed that Angel had fallen asleep while he was thinking. Sighing in frustration, he quickly finished the stitches and slipped out from under her. Running around, he burst into Party’s and Ghouls’ room to tell them the news. He hadn’t thought that through. “What the hell man?” Party yelled.”SORRY, I’M GOING! EW EW EW EW EW EW EW,” He ran back out. Shuddering, he set down the hall towards Jet. He’d have to bleach that image out of his brain.

“I think I figured out what happened,” he slipped inside quickly. Jet glanced up at him briefly, then focused his attention back on Angel’s friend. “She said that she killed Beast,” 

Jet’s hands paused in his work, digesting that information, then resumed. “Okay,” was all he said.

“Okay!? C’mon, this is really bad news. Like yeah, none of us liked Beast or his business, but now we have to worry about them as well as Korse.”

Jet just continued working.

Kobra was getting pretty steamed. “Dude, just because you’re sweet on her doesn’t mean you can just excuse everything she does,”

That got his attention. “I’m not sweet on her, how many times do I have to tell you?” 

“I’m not saying it’s bad, like you need someone,” Jet took a step towards him and Kobra hurried on. “I mean come on! We all have someone! Party and Ghoul, me and Pete, you’re the fifth wheel,”

Jet took a deep breath and composed himself before speaking. “Just stop. Yes, it’s bad that Beast is dead, but we can’t change that, so what do you want me to do?”

Kobra opened his mouth and then paused. He didn’t know what he wanted to happen. Jet gave him a knowing look.

“Exactly.” Jet turned back to the table. “Are you gonna help me or what?” he called over his shoulder. After a minute Kobra relented and went over there. “If it really means so much to you, I’ll talk to her,” Jet said quietly as he handed Kobra some bandages. A slow smile spread across Kobra's face as he took them and he nudged Jet with his shoulder. “Two regular love birds you are”

“Shut up,”

“Oh come on. You two obviously have the biggest crushes on each other, just go for it!”

They worked in silence for a while, then Jet abruptly turned to Kobra.

“Seriously?” his eyes searched Kobra’s. 

Kobra clapped his hand onto Jet’s shoulder. “Seriously,”*

 

Ew. A filler chapter. Not only that, a freaking love filler chapter. Oh, what if this turns into a coffee shop au? It better not, I’d revolt. On the other hand… *creepy smile* *like seriously, you can hear it* *how is that possible?* *Oh my goodness, they’re eyeing the Frerard and Petekey* *help* *I don’t feel comfortable* *The author is creeped out by the narrator, HELP ME* Anyway, what will happen next time? Will the Fabulous Four ever get to eat? Will Michael be okay? Find out next time on Killjoy Life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! We finally got the Fabulous Killjoys in. 
> 
> Also I'm sorry. If you haven't noticed by now... Jet is my favorite character. But to be fair, Ray deserves more love and frankly, we all obsessed over a band that's been dead for nearly 6 years, so no one can lecture me. 
> 
> It's my fanfiction.
> 
> I DO WHAT I WANT


	7. This Is Why You Don't Bet, Kids

*When Michael woke up, he was very confused. He was in a bed, in a room he didn’t know, with no idea what had happened. Swinging his legs down to the floor, he looked around. It was a small room, stocked with medical supplies. On one side there was a door that was open, and he could faintly hear people talking.He spotted his knapsack at the foot of the bed and sighed in relief. Angel must have taken him somewhere to get cleaned up. Well, he supposed it was time to meet the family, so to speak. Standing up gingerly, he made his way through the door and down the corridor, wincing all the way. He paused outside the door and peered in, just to scope out the territory.

Angel and a few guys were sitting at a table, laughing as one in a red jacket and shades struggled to eat the contents of a can. As Michael watched, he gagged and spat it back out.

“Guys, I just can’t do it, it’s disgusting,”

“It’s the only food we’ve got! Stop being so picky,” another guy with firehouse hair and a blue jacket complained.

“No one can eat a bite of this stuff, let alone a whole can,”

“Wanna bet, Kobra?” Angel asked. 

Suddenly the mood shifted from joking to serious. “You’re on,” Kobra said

“If I eat an entire can, you have to fix my gun and give it a new style,” she plonked her ray gun onto the table.

“What happened to it?”

She shrugged. “Don’t know. Failed on me during a drac raid.”

“Whatever. Put your money where your mouth is already.” Kobra sneered.

Angel grabbed a can and cranked it open. Staring at power pup, she paused for a second with a look of revulsion on her face. Then she dug in, shoveling heaping spoonful after spoonful in her mouth. The guys were cheering and Michael nearly threw up in his mouth. No wonder Angel was so different now. She’d been living like an animal for who knows how long.

‘How could anyone eat that disgusting slop?’ he wondered with fascination and horror as angel kept going. Finally she slammed the can on the table. “Done,” she announced triumphantly.

Kobra’s face fell and everyone went wild. Michael noticed Angel’s face getting green. “Oh god, she’s gonna throw up,” he muttered under his breath right before Angel ran outside. You could hear her throwing up viciously. When she finally stumbled back inside, the guys were silent.   
“You alright?” one of them asked, brushing his curly hair out of his face.

She nodded as Kobra made his way over. “I win,” he said quietly.

Angel immediately grew adamant. “Nu-uh, you just said I had to eat a can, you never said anything about keeping it down!”

They glared at each other and looked ready to go in a cat fight. The group started edging forward, ready to intervene, when Michael took matters into his own hands. Pushing the door open, he strutted on in. Everyone jumped apart and looked at him. “Hey Angel,” he nodded at her. “You gonna introduce me to your friends?”

She had a look on her face. A face that said ‘Are you serious? I’m going to kill you,’ Finally she shook herself and headed back to the table. “This isn’t over,” she called over her shoulder as she slid back into the booth.

Everyone followed, since they were at a loss of what to do. “Okay. Guys, this is Michael. Michael, this dumbos are the ‘Fabulous Killjoys’” she said in a mocking tone. Someone kicked her from under the table.

“Respect us! We’re the face of the fight!” the short guy with black hair said.

Rolling her eyes, Angel continued. “Party’s the leader, he has red hair, Ghoul’s his boyfriend, he’s the shorty with a few screws loose, if you catch my drift, Kobra is Party’s brother and he only feels one emotion, and the guy with the killer hair is Jet. Respect him, as he’s the medic, and probably the one that fixed you up,”

Michael took a look at the faces lined around the table. It was an impressive line-up, he had to admit. One of the guys, Jet? cleared his throat and began questioning him. “How exactly do you two know each other?”

“Oh, we used to be friends before the Helium wars. Then I left Earth for a while, but now I’m back.” 

“You left Earth.” Kobra asked.

“Yeah, to learn how to time-travel on Tardin. It’s complicated business, I wouldn't expect you lot to understand,” Michael said flippantly, waving his hands around.

“Uh-huh,” Party said, before turning to angel. “And you believe this guy?”

She shrugged. “He has the tech to back him up. Plus he was never in any Battery City logs, I’ve checked before.  
“Okay. well then, what does he want?” Party pivoted to peer at him.

“What do you mean?”

“Why would you leave a nice safe planet with nice tech to come to a broken one in the throes of a war?”

Michael’s face flushed. “Well, you see… it’s kind of complicated… I don’t want to insinuate… It’s none of your business in the first place!”

“He started a Civil War on his planet between the presidents, who apparently, were all time-traveling aliens”

“Dude! It’s a little more complicated than that!”

She pivoted to look at him. “Really? Cause I thought that pretty much summed it up perfectly,”

“Well, I mean,I had good intentions at the time.”

“Doesn’t matter, you ruined your planet.”

“So why is he here?” Ghoul asked 

“He ran away, as the Civil war is over and this evil corporation took over and want him dead. Sound familiar?”

The guys sent him suspicious glances. Michael hurried to cover up the bad light Angel was painting him in.

“But I’m going to help you guys take down BLI, and then you can help me take down SPO. Sound like a fair deal?”

They shrugged. “Whatever,” Kobra muttered. 

“Anyway, we’re still going to go on that mission. You up to join us?” Party cut in.

“Really? I’d love to. Who’s group am I going with?” Angel said, a huge grin sliding over her face.

“You can go with Jet and Kobra. Give me and Party some alone time,” Ghoul said, wiggling his eyebrows at Party. 

“No way you’d get no work done, you take angel,” Koba complained.

“But I don’t want to hear Party and Ghoul doing it! How about Michael go with them?”

“Yeah, that could work,” Jet mused.

“Hold up,” Michael interrupted. “What mission? And you don’t just get to volunteer me like that!” 

“Yes we do,” Angel shot back.

“We’re going around shooting all the secret cameras that the dracs have in the zones,” Party explained. “Dr. D hooked us up with a map that tells us where they all are.”

“And this will help us defeat BLI?” 

Everyone exchanged a glance. “It will come in handy… later on,” Party said mysteriously.

“Anyway,” Angel cut in, “Jet, Kobra and I will take zones 1, 2 and 3, heading down on Route Guano. Party, Ghoul and Michael take zones 4, 5 and 6.”

“Why do we get the boring zones? There are hardly any dracs to ghost out there,” Ghoul complained.

“Because one, you two,” Angel pointed at Ghoul and Party, “will be very distracted and won’t notice a drac patrol sneaking up on you and two, Michael is inexperienced.”

“Also we can visit Pete,” Kobra added.

“That too”

Party nodded. “Alright. We’ll set off tomorrow.”

Michael gaped at them. “Tomorrow?” he squealed

“:Well yeah silly,” Angel looked at him like he was crazy.”We get stuff done here in the zones,”

Everyone laughed and Michael just sat there, feeling so out of his depth.*

Awww, poor Michael. He needs a new name, his is so… average compared to the others. This should be exciting, a mission! Will they succeed with their goal? Will everyone stay safe as they venture out into the zones? How are Kobra and Angel going to settle the debt? Find out next time… on Killjoy Life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed


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